The Arrogance of Power

Once upon a time in Liberalville Indiana, there were elected government officials who thought they knew what was best for their misinformed, ignorant constituents. After all, these elected officials believed thety were the smartest and brightest in all the land. The officials knew that once the constituents learned their reasons for controlling the use of personal land, keeping all growth to a few square miles and minimizing economic opportunity, that the people would embrace and accept the officials' wisdom.

But alas, it wasn't to be. The people weren't stupid. They did understand. And guess what--they didn not agree. So they spoke out. They created a website. They signed petitions. They attended public meetings. They tried to get their issues heard.  But the question is, did the elected officials listen? Will they try to find common ground and room for compromise? Or will the arrogance of power prevail?

Is it over yet?

According to the Pew Research organization, 50% of Americans have a negative view of the last decade. Well, DUH! Of course we're ready for it to end, especially those of us here in B'town. This blog's too small to recap all the weird things from the last 10 years so I'll just mention some that come immediately to mind. First and foremost were the fighter planes intercepting an Amish farmer's plane over Bloomington the week of 9/11/01. My poor parents, remembering Pearl Harbor, thought we were under attack. For some reason, the pilot just didn't get the message that the airports were closed to everyone--even Amish farmers from southern Indiana.

Then who would have imagined that Miles Brand would have the balls to fire Bobby Knight or hire those athletic directors McNaulty and Greenspan? Could hizzoner, the President, have dug any further down in the barrel of green slime? Then not to be outdone, his successor supported the hiring of Kelvin Sampson who must have been lurking at its very bottom. Thank goodness for Fred Glass.

This also seemed to be the decade of "traffic calming." That's the Liberalville synonym for building hazardous obstacles in the middle of the street. It's a wonder that complete neighborhoods have not been destroyed due to a fire truck's inability to maneuver the roadway or round the round- abouts...especially on 7th Street. This must have been the reason so many Bloomingtonians converted to "Smart" cars. They were the only ones intelligent enough to traverse our dangerous but "calm" streets.

Another marker of the decade was the invasion of the "Coasties," a form of locust. They arrive en masse each August and leave every May in 4-year cycles. The females are easily identified by their UGGs, black leggings, huge sun glasses, Longchamp tote bags and North Face jackets...The male species are seen in pajama bottoms, flip flops, stubbly beards and bed heads. Both sexes swarm through downtown in Beamers, Escalades, Porshes and the like all bearing license plates from New York and New Jersey.

Oh, I could go on and on and rant and rant. But in the interest of starting the next decade on a high, up-beat note, I'll just say au revoir and adieu to the aughts. Good riddance. Bring on the teens.

The Balloon Trial

Everyone's heard that politicians repeatadly send up "trial balloons" to test public policy or public opinion. But here in Liberalville its the balloons that are on trial. Literally. Our lack-luster planning commission has cited a local businessman with a violation of our city zoning ordinance related to his use of common, plain, everyday balloons to draw attention to the signs for his rental property. Not a single word was printed on said balloons. No daunting message beckoning visitors or promoting the rental of his property. The balloons said NOTHING! Even more outragious the said fine for said wordless balloons was an outragious, whopping $95,000.

I guess the Liberalville signage gestapo thought that nailing the balloon perp was an ideal way to finance some of their other more important endeavors. Not sure what those might be, but I'm sure they'd come up with something. Maybe they were thinking the extra revenue would support their flock of investigators that travel the courthouse square measuring unsuspecting retailers' sidewalk sign boards.

Or maybe they're wanting to recruit extra investigators to measure the homemade bed sheet signage hanging from fraternity and sorority house windows throughout the college school year. I'm pretty sure those signs violate some kind of city signage ordinance. Or why don't they consider hiding behind bushes ready to trounce on graffiti artists and hall them into court. I have an even better idea. How about slapping the IU Alumni Association Homecoming Committee with the same fine. Look at those balloons=>.

Traffic Control: Liberalville Style

Liberalville takes pride in making life miserable for those of us who live inside its borders and traverse its streets in cars. Our city fathers would prefer (and truly believe it's feasable) that we rode camels, horses, bicycles, skateboards or any vehicle not requiring carbon- emitting fuels. If Liberalville was a utopia, that might be feasible. But it is not. People have to drive cars to work, to shop, to school and to the hospital. That is the reality. Driving cars is a necessity--not the luxury it might be perceived.

To combat their "carsaphobia," Liberalville neighborhood groups coerce city engineers to erect barriers, concrete planters, flapping plastic obstacles and any other device they can construct to prevent or encumber a person from driving from the east side to the west side of town. They literally dare anyone --emergency vehicles include-- to drive through their neighborhoods unscathed.

The elected Liberalville city council sit in its ivory tower and rubber stamps any random thoughts, ideas or outrageous concepts regarding traffic control brought before them. It pays little or no regard for public safety or convenience. The city constructs traffic barriers with total disregard for merchants, business owners or anyone else that might be relying on customers arriving in motorized vehicles.

Liberalville's scholarly lords and masters just turn their collective cheeks and choose to simply ignore the oublic safety and economic problems they've created. So we, as their constituent serfs, are forced to navigate our way through traffic purgatory while diligently watching for obstacles in our streets that could harm us, our passengers and our vehicles.